My Christmas Story....err Lesson

Well, I went ahead and decorated early for Christmas! I just cant help myself. I love Christmas so much and to only have it up for a month seems so sad to me!
Anyway, to be perfectly honest, this is not how I thought my Christmas would be this year. Last Christmas, I already had a few negative pregnancy test and was so sad because I really hoped to be able to tell my parents and in laws for Christmas....even if I were very early...But I pushed on and knew it was common to not get pregnant right away. I guess I just thought by Christmas there would be a child in this house. I never in a million years thought otherwise. I cant explain the feeling of month after month of not conceiving. The first 6 months hurt, but the pain of hitting a year and still nothing is something I hope not many have to go through. I cant even imagine those to go years and years trying. It can take over your life, your relationship and yourself. To be perfectly honest, it became a chore, something that it had never been before. Then I gave up. I gave up hope, stopped trying, and became very down. Then the news of my tumors came and talk about a shock. I never ever thought I would ever have a tumor in my body, let alone 3 in my throat and one in my head. I will say, as sad and scared I was/am, (but mostly was) I was so relieved to hold on to hope that the reason my body was rejecting a baby is because it had 3 dumb things sitting on my thyroid. I guess after I heal from my next go around with it, I will see what 2013 will bring, hopefully bring a friend to some of my sweet friend's children. ;)

I guess what I have learn this past year and a half is:

 1. I need to stop planning my future.

 2. When you start planning your future and try and "take matters in your own hands" and not His, He will throw you a curve ball!! and finally

3. He is always 10 steps ahead of us. He knows before we do and is so merciful to His children. So merciful.

So in 2013, I will relax, not worry about "trying" at all, I will enjoy the love of my life and know that His timing is perfect, because He knows better than me. Who am I to plan my life?

I get it Lord, lesson learned.

Fa la la la la...la la laaa bleh...

I have a really bad habit of starting a blog, letting it sit for a couple of days, then deleting it. This one I will finish... and publish. Now what have I been up to....not much lately.

I had a little procedure. I'll spare the details and gross incision pictures, things like that. All I am going to say is, I am not sure if I'll ever sing like I use to again. Which scares me a little. Not that I sing in front of people, but I love to sing here by myself and its nice to be able to carry a tune. I'm sure itll work itself out, but for now, it sounds pretty bad! Ha!

Its everything I can do not to put my Christmas stuff out, last year it was coming out by now, but I think thats because we had just moved in and it was the first time I got to have a tall tree! This year I am holding back until Thanksgiving day. I'm sure I'll feel good enough bring up the tree and get this house together. I have company coming in the first of December, so its gotta be looking Christmas-y around here! It will be fun to take them around Nashville and do some fun Christmas activities! Since I married Scrooge, I usually do those things with a Grinch by my side! I will take any suggestions on must-see's in Nashville. I think I am kind of dumb to things people want to do when they visit.

I am slowly going crazy 1,2,3,4,5,6 switch!

I..am...going...crazy....

Cabin fever has kicked in. I think I have been out of the house for about a total of 15 hours this past week! And 13 of them was Friday night, Saturday night and Sunday afternoon. I'm about to go crazy in here! I have always thought staying home and not working would be the dream, but one can lose their minds very quickly! Not that I feel like doing much as is. I become tired fast and that takes the fun out of being out and about!

Now onto more important things. Why am I just now watching Downton Abby. My mother has been trying to get me to watch it for years and I just couldnt add another show. But now that Weeds is done and I'm home all FREEAAAKINGGG day, my show schedule has a few openings! I'm open to any show suggestions. Daytime TV is for the birds. I love Ellen, but thats only 1 hour out of many to fill. Unfortunately, read is out of the question right now. Focusing isnt easy on my eyes or head.

I suppose I could take Laila for more walks. Probably would be nice for both of us. Oh, but I hope my neighbors wont bother me. There is nothing that gets on my nerves more than neighbors. I dont mind the waving or the occasional, "Hello!", but this whole, lets know more about each other because we live by each other is bothersome! ....Ok, this took an unexpected Ebenezer Scrooge turn. Anyway, I will buck up and walk past the neighbors to get out of this house this week!!! I will. Maybe. Probably not. I really dont want to chat. So no.

Gwen Drank All the Water

I'm beyond baffled by Gwen Stefani. I love No Doubt, well at least Tragic Kingdom, and I like both of their new songs. They went back to the Ska type music that was originally No Doubt. I'm bummed because I cant find my Sublime CD. I have lost a lot of my old CD's and I guess Sublime was a casualty. Anyway back to Gwen. I was watching her on Ellen and was in shock with how great she looked! I mean, I dont look like that at 28, let alone 42....almost 43 in a few weeks!!!

 My girl, you rock! I know all her water comes from the Fountain of Youth! I hope to drink of that in the years to come...if she hasnt slurped it all up by then!! But until then, Ill have to follow what Floyd $$ Mayweather says, "Hard work/Dedication!" I know my husband would be proud I quoted him! Now to practice those words!


                       Now let's talk about my eyes. My medication is making the bags under my eyes terrible! So much for looking like Gwen! I guarantee her bags arent as big, and if they are, she'll pay someone to make them new and beautiful again! As for mine, I will be using a gallon of concealer and ice cubes! Perhaps a little eye shadow and eye liner will help mask the toll this mess is taking on my eyes! ...or a little R&R at a spa for a massage and facial. I doubt Chad will go for that! But I could away pull the sick card :) He's going to catch on soon and my power will dwindle and I'll be left at home watching daytime TV, with stiff muscles and clogged pores. I shall use my power wisely.

    

My favorite season/ BoBB talk/ A passive aggressive PSA

Yesterday my cousin Whitney came to visit. It was nice to catch up a bit. It was the first time she has been to the house, in fact, I dont think I have seen her but twice this past year. But no matter what, we pick up where we left off and it only feels like days. We all went over to James and Holly's house for dinner. Going over there is always great. Its nice to have a laid back friendship with people, where your're not obligated to put on an entertaining face. Its nice to just sit around the table and chat. I'm so thankful for those friendships. I wouldnt trade that group of friends for anything. James is an excellent chef, so of course, we had an awesome dinner....as always! Fish tacos and such. So so good! 
I met Holly for a little fall crafting this afternoon. That went so well.....*sarcasm*.... We ended up just buying some decorations, you know, stayed there for 2 1/2 hours. Sheesh. Can you tell Chad never browses with me??  It was really nice to look at most everything in the Halloween section 200 times and not be pushed to leave! I got some stuff to decorate my mantel, but I feel like its lacking something. Any suggestions would be greatly appreciated. Please excuse the picture quality. It is not up to par! Perhaps I will retake it and post a better, more focused picture.

 The Fall puts me in such a great mood.Today felt awesome outside. I wish everyday felt like today! Its the little thing, like these Harvest M&Ms that make me smile!


******Britt steps onto her soapbox******

 Now that we have a computer that works well, I am able to watch some TV on my laptop (...and I have an awesome friend w/ Netflix)! Right now, I get to watch The Business of Being Born series. I just watched the celebrity one! I love hearing all these mother's stories. I cant wait until I'll be able to have my own birth story! Kate Hudson just shared her VBAC story on Ellen. I think its so awesome to hear about women who have VBAC's. Its ingrained in us that it is too painful and cant be done, but I think we as women can underestimate how strong we are. We are so quick to jump on the pain free method without challenging ourselves. And thats how I see it, as a challenge. Can I deliver a baby, feel every bit of what is happening to my body and know I did it medicine free? I hope so! I think it is annoying is when people tell me I'm crazy and wont be able to do it. I would never tell anyone I think the way they chose to give birth was a dumb choice, because it was their choice and we all have the freedom to make our own choices. I only hope one day I'll be able to prove them differently. Most of my friends had drugs when they gave birth, so I cant knock them, they are still champs!  I cant knock any mamas.  Please dont get me wrong, I am so thankful for modern medicine and the technology to save lives ( believe me), but you can bet I'll do whatever to take the holistic route first. This has been a hot topic in my house lately. If any follow up treatments are needed, I will try a natural approach first. Medicine/Treatments, they can be so harsh on your body, and I want less in mine as possible.

                                        *******Britt steps off her soapbox and puts it away for a while*******

With that being said and the soapbox gone, here are a few things you DO NOT say/do to someone when you find out they are sick :

1. Its God's will  <--really people? really.
2. Technology today is great! <---- yes, I know that. No, it does not make it better.
3. I WebMDed it. Wow, thats bad. <---thank you, I love to hear that
4. Are you scared you could die? <--- yes friends, that was a real question. And no, I will be around a long time
5.I bet youre glad to know that it wasnt just you eating bad that caused the weight gain. <--- ok, now see, that wasnt my number 1 thought last week. I wonder how long you have been thinking I was a Fatty McButterpants.
6. I knew someone with kind of the same thing, it's not as bad as you think <---easy for you to say, that someone wasnt you!!!!!!

I'm sure I'll have more as time goes by.


This is going to be a learning process. I look forward to see how the Lord will be able to use this as a Growing method for Him.

My first post in years!

It has been a while since I have lasted blogged. Partly because I don't know who would care to read what I have to say, buy mostly because I'm too lazy to sit down and Doogie Howser Carrie Bradshaw it!
I have never been much on airing my personal life on the Internet, let alone letting whoever wants to read about it, but I figure there is no time like the present and perhaps being more open will be a sort of therapy for me. I'm sure I will get into what is going on with myself as I learn more how to open up on a blog and not just talk about what shows I'm digging at the moment (Dexter, Weeds, Always Sunny). It will give me the opportunity to say what is going on with out answering 100 questions and feeling drained. This is a big, scary step for me. Being open is not always my forte!

Anyway!!!

Last weekend Chad and I went to the cabin with our friends. We had white water rafting tickets, but as life would have it, I cannot do that right now, so I got the chance to sit down with my sweet friend Crystal and make a fall wreath. I have never been a crafty person, so I really thought it would be a bust, but I pulled out my inner Martha and crafted myself a pretty banging wreath!! It is now proudly placed on my front door for all...or my friends... to see! 

Other than not getting to go rafting, I had a really nice time. It is always nice being with that group. Chad and I say over and over how blessed we are with our groups of friends. They are always so much fun! Tomorrow we are going to another group of friends house! They are another group that we love to be around. We always leave the dinner parties so happy and thankful for kind, wonderful friends. There is something about being with people that you have known since you were kids and carrying that friendship into adulthood. And knowing one day, your babies will know each other and grow together and hopefully carry that friendship into their adult lives.

Now see how fast this got boring! Let's hope I learn to be a more interesting blogger. Until then, here is my first and super boring blog!